Two days ago I was leading Danny from his pen to the arena to stretch his legs. The pasture is off limits due to irrigation, so all anyone is getting is some roll time in the arena while I clean pens. But Danny was having trouble getting there.
He is weaving and bobbing (more than usual) not wanting to leave his pen, not being Danny at all. His feet hurt. I can see that they hurt. His lower legs are warmer than usual. It could be laminitis, caused from the senior feed he gets, although he is not over weight. In fact he is thin, his hips are starting to sink in, his back bone is sticking out he is losing the muscle tone in his front which is what allows him to pull himself along.
What I see is a horse that is no longer happy, and with that in mind I made a decision. That decision will be carried out today. I have spent the last 24 hours questioning if I am doing the right thing, but each time I go out and look at him, I feel like I am.
I keep trying to focus on the last 8 years of his life. 3 with my mom, and 5 with me. He has been happy and well cared for. He has been loved, and spoiled and enjoyed as a pasture ornament. He was taken from a horrid environment and treated like the king. I can take comfort in that. He was my class clown, always making me laugh with his silly antics and big personality. I will miss him so much.
Danny was somebodies wonder horse at one time, and I am so glad that he was a part of my life.
That is the hardest decision anyone had to make, but you are doing what is best for Danny. Sweet journey Danny. I am so sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteAwww my heart goes out to you. I know just what you are going through, and I hope that through your tears you will remember what a blessing he was to you, and you to him. ((((hugs))))
ReplyDeleteOh, I'm so sorry, my friend. It's the right thing to do, but it's also the hardest.
ReplyDelete{{{hug}}}
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry you're having to do this. I bet Danny is grateful to have you do this one last final act of kindness for him.
ReplyDeleteSuch a hard decision to make. Seconds on Zoe's comment, and hugs from here, as well.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry. Even when it is the right thing to do, it is so hard.
ReplyDeleteI'm so so sorry, Cindy. Not an easy choice to make...but you are doing the right thing by him. *hugs*
ReplyDeleteIt's the hardest decision we ever have to make. But in reality it is a last kindness we can do for the ones we love. Godspeed Danny.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry :(
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear this, I can't imagine how hard the decision was! you're in my thoughts!
ReplyDeleteWe each face this with every horse that owns us. It is never easy and never will be. He has led a good life with you and will definitely be waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge. I have a herd there too and they will be sure to welcome him in.
ReplyDeleteAs blogger friend Kestral said to me when I lost my big red mare- A tear and a toast.
When it's time its time. Feel more guilty about NOT making this decision. I've seen people who let suffer for months. Hugs.
ReplyDelete((((cindy))))
ReplyDelete:(
My sympathies...
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sure Danny thanks you for your kindness. He will live forever in your heart and thoughts. ((Hugs))
ReplyDeleteI'm so, so sorry.....
ReplyDeleteAww, beautiful old Danny. You've done right by him all along, and continue to do so now when life has become too painful for him. I'm sorry. I know he was very special to you, and he'll live on in your memories forever. Hugs to you.
ReplyDeleteRest well sweet Danny, and run free on the other side.
ReplyDeleteHugs Cindy it is never easy but it is right when it is their time
Thank you everyone for your comments. It helps to have the support of friends, even if only through the internet. Otherwise I would have been dealing with this on my own, and that would have been too much.
ReplyDeleteI am surprised out Trax's reaction to Danny being gone. I did not realize just how close they were. He was distressed all day yesterday. Now I think he has moved on, as horses do.
The vet said that I absolutely made the right decision, so that helped some too.
Rest peacefully sweet Danny! You did the right thing... in their own way they let us know when they're ready. It's never easy, but we have to listen. Hugs to you and your herd!
ReplyDeleteOh I am sorry to hear this, but Danny had a good life with you and just hugs sent to you.
ReplyDelete